Silvia Gonzalez

I use mindful practices rooted in Chan/Zen to help clients reinvent a healthier relationship with finances.

I’ve had an accounting practice for 20 years, which has provided me with a clear understanding of how people manage their finances. I’ve listened to my clients reveal their underlying fears about their businesses and the financial difficulties they’ve encountered and learned the importance of focusing on the individual as a whole rather than just managing their books.

I’ve also been actively meditating daily for the past 18 years.  Five of those years, I practiced and volunteered regularly at Dharma Drum Retreat Center, a Buddhist Chan Center founded by Chan Master Sheng Yen. Through attending numerous intensive, silent retreats led by Master Sheng Yen’s lineage successors or monastic teachers, I learned the art of deep listening. In doing so, I am able to allow clients to discover for themselves how they have contributed to their circumstances and how to correct their reactions and responses to help themselves.

Additionally, I attended a weekend workshop dedicated to learning how to assist in facilitating retreats. This training was further enhanced by continuously attending retreats including a 21 day, silent retreat in Europe. During my volunteering,  I was assigned the mediation hall frequently which facilitated in broadening my understanding of mediation from the perspective of an observer.

My experience continues to grow as I provide workshops, classes, or volunteer at other centers co-facilitating Chan/Zen retreats.

I am a certified rehabilitation counselor (CRC) with a master’s degree in clinical rehabilitation counseling and a bachelor’s degree in accounting.

I’m currently employed as a clinician at an outpatient treatment facility which provides individual, group and family treatment for people with substance use disorder and co-occurring disorders. I also incorporate mindfulness living and meditation.

I’ve combined my life experiences with money, work, and Chan/Zen practice to bring you Wise Finances.

Here’s my personal journey through finances:

My earliest experience with finances is waiting on line outside the welfare office waiting for the doors to open at nineteen. I was pregnant, the father had left, and I could not support myself let alone a child. The only solution I saw at the time was to get help from the state. I remember feeling trapped in my situation because I could not see past it. I stayed on welfare for three years while I went to a trade school and college. I graduated from the trade school and was able to find a job that could support us with the help of my parents. I was elated to have a job and not depend on the state. I can’t describe how I felt when I received my first check.

As the years went on, I noticed I was acquiring more and more debt. I started having difficulty paying my bills. I became very depressed and anxious about my financial situation. By the age of twenty-six, debt overwhelmed me and I filed for bankruptcy. Eliminating my debt took a lot of the stress away and it relieved me from the financial burden.

Then, at thirty-five, I found myself in the same position. I had accumulated $28,000 of debt that I again could not pay off. Only this time, I had an accounting degree and a successful accounting practice. How could this be? I questioned everything I knew about finances and my relationship with money. How could a bankruptcy not teach me anything?

My husband at the time was listening to Dave Ramsey and was insisting on us following his regime. We picked up his book, The Total Money Make Over, and I read it in one night. The next day, I implemented the regimen and getting out of debt seemed to be promising. However, I knew from past experiences there was more to finances than just the numbers; therefore, I started analyzing my situation and understanding the importance of my emotions in relation to my spending habits. Getting out of debt the first time through a bankruptcy had not taught me anything. It had erased the debt but had not healed the emotional side of my finances and that’s why I believe nine years later, I was in the same position.

I continued my journey by paying close attention to what drove me to spend money and how I felt when I did. I realized that every purchase had an emotional attachment to it. I didn’t spend money because I needed to. I spent money irresponsibly because there was something inside of me I was trying to ignore or stifle. I recognized how much my ego was involved in every purchase. I wrapped my identity around my possessions and my status in society. This new way of looking at my finances began the transformation. I began to look inside every time I spent money and it made all the difference. I began to heal myself and my relationship with money. It became friendly. I no longer hated my finances and blamed all the credit card companies. I began to accept how I had contributed to my financial downfall and let go of blaming everyone else for my situation.

Now if unexpected circumstances arise, I implement my method and I am able to handle my finances with ease.